So I've decided to embark on a pointless project because I'm bored. All of the titles until I get bored will be from some song I'm listening to. Anyone that knows the song wins..... nothing. On the next post, I'll post which song it was from. Why? Because it'll seem less oppressive and give me a humanistic flare. Heh.. like I'm human.
Anyway, in my random scrounging recently, I happened upon a pre-internet rant. Apparently before I got the brainwave of blogging my rage, I wrote it down, old-pen style. Like the vikings would have done, had they the tools to do so.
But since this seems appropriate, and my rage is currently on the Oscars and intershnitzel piracy laws, I'll allow those to formulate and give you, my loyal reader, the first in my one-part series: Rage before the internet. Consume!
"What's the deal with the media and crappy commercials? For example, the subway commercial. Why is an entire family scream about one sub that they haven't even paid for yet? It's a 4-person family, so what are they going to do? Share it a eat three inches each? Also, what the deal with this 6-7 carbs crap? I haven't met anyone that goes to subway actively looking to lose weight. The bread alone kills any chance of you losing weight. And don't talk to me about Jared. Obviously he excercised and ate good food anyways. For him to lose over 100 pounds solely eating subway would take well over two years. That's 3 meals a day, 365 times X2. Or, 1035 X 2 = 2070. Each meal is around 10 dollars. . . totalling 20140 dollars on subs alone! Unless he's rich already, in which he wouldn't need to appear in their commercials, then he didn't just eat subway. What a scam."
Oh, how delightfully ignorant of me! Now obviously this is referring to some old-ass commercial subway put out, from I think around December 2004, but if I'm not mistaken, that commercial is gone. So I'm taking credit for that one. Anyway, I gave up on watching TV because commercials pissed me off too much, so I don't know if Jared's still being whored out from subway, but either way, that was REALLY fucking annoying.
This raises a bigger point about commercials, at least, to bring it back to the future. Like I said, I don't watch TV anymore, but jeebus, was it just me, or are commercials responsible for destroying a lot of people's "enjoyment" of wasting their day in front of the TV? I don't need to be bombarded by 8 million propaganda pieces telling me why some paid 'actor' is reading a script about why some household cleaning product rules, in a house that doesn't need cleaning, only caused by messes that children they don't know caused? Are these commercials supposed to make us feel like we want that product, or that everything the TV world makes is better than our crappy belongings? Bitter.
-Mark
1 comment:
Man Man, indeed. And speaking of, has that torrent popped up yet? I'm dying to hear the rest of that album.
I remember that bloody Subway commercial; it was annoyingly incoherent at best. Incidentally, I loved that moment from Supersize Me where Jared (who, I've heard, has aides) joins a mother in berating her overweight daughter. They mocked how she didn't have any friends and cried herself to sleep. Compassionate filmmaking at its finest.
Oh, and while the vikings may not have had ballpoint pens at their disposal, I have it on good authority that they rocked many a village with their inspired electric guitar skills. BAM!
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