So I went and saw War of the Worlds last week, and I was actually fairly impressed with it. The story wasn't all that different, although there was some key changes about the invasion of aliens that was cool. However, it's come to my attention that Steven Speilberg has no fucking CLUE how to end a movie.
Sure, there was things I loved in the movie - like the lasers that turned people into dust, and the scene where it was raining clothes. Gold. And the special effects were very well done, but then it's like he just didn't know how to end the movie, or how shitty human warfare would defeat an obviously superior force..... so he shat himself and decided that they just "died". He tried to throw together a nonsensical explanation a la Morgan Freeman's narration, which actually had the word "micro" in it, which either meant the aliens died via bacteria, or that humans were micro and won via the aliens "forgetting" to turn on their shields or some other nonsensical bullshit.
And that fucking kid DIED. You can't just have him run into an explosion, disappear for the rest of the movie and have him randomly appear at the end alive and fine and there before the main character and his daughter. He's DEAD... half the fucking army he ran after died, but he survived with no protective clothing (not that it would have helped anyway), no weapons, and no transportation? Bullshit, he's dead.
Steven Spielberg can make good movies (Jaws, but that was 30 years ago), but when you forget how to end a movie or end it without a climax, it really ruins the whole thing.
I'd rate the movie in stars, but fuck that shit - watch it yourself, nobody gives a shit what I rate the movie out of. I still recommend watching it, just be prepared to be pissed at the end of it.
-Mark
4 comments:
Now Mark,
You know I'm not one to stop someone from hating on Hollywood, but I'd be remiss if I didn't interrupt you here. Yes, most of the reviews have been deploring the lack of proper explosive conclusion (cf. Independence Day). But I've got to give him credit for not fucking with the ending, as it comes straight from the text (well, without that bird bullshit). HG Wells wrote the original text back in 1898, as a diatribe against amoral British imperialism. The aliens were, in fact, slain by the bacteria in our biosphere. From the online text of the book:
"The Martians--dead!--slain by the putrefactive and disease bacteria against which their systems were unprepared; slain as the red weed was being slain; slain, after all man's devices had failed, by the humblest things that God, in his wisdom, has put upon this earth. For so it had come about, as indeed I and many men might have foreseen had not terror and disaster blinded our minds. These germs of disease have taken toll of humanity since the beginning of things--taken toll of our prehuman ancestors since life began here. But by virtue of this natural selection of our kind we have developed resisting power; to no germs do we succumb without a struggle, and to many--those that cause putrefaction in dead matter, for instance--our living frames are altogether immune. But there are no bacteria in Mars, and directly these invaders arrived, directly they drank and fed, our microscopic allies began to work their overthrow. Already when I watched them they were irrevocably doomed, dying and rotting even as they went to and fro. It was inevitable. By the toll of a billion deaths man has bought his birthright of the earth, and it is his against all comers; it would still be his were the Martians ten times as mighty as they are. For neither do men live nor die in vain."
So yeah, they just up and died. But that's the whole fucking point. And it makes sense, historically, when you realize what Wells was trying to say with his work. It's a nasty blow to the human ego, especially when Spielberg recontextualizes the struggle with explicit allusions to the WTC attacks.
I enjoyed the movie, but as you've noted, the major exception was the final frames. Clearly, that kid should have perished. And when Tom "You don't know the history of psychiatry, I do!" Cruise shows up at his ex's doorstep, she would have been like, "well, one out of two ain't bad!"
But Spielberg was chicken-shit, and couldn't possibly make a film (about fear, no less) without tacking on a bullshit conclusion that restores the sanctity of the family in a time of post-9/11 paranoia. So for my own mental well-being, I've decided that the little prick *did* die on that field. He simply pulls an Obi-Wan and shows up as a ghost at the end.
Now Justin,
I realize that it's a book-turned-movie (see: lack of Originality in Hollywood, sub-ref: Stealing plots from books) that Spielberg was creating, and it does make sense that the humans sucked at destroying their enemies, and I can even live with the bacteria killing the aliens, but what ices me is that he didn't even bother to explain that. He just said "microorganisms" or some BS along those lines, but it was so garbled that one could mistake it for a metaphor referring to humans being tiny - after all, they were tiny compared to machines that were raping their asses and vapourizing (comically, I may add) them. If he'd properly explained that, it'd make the ending 50% more bareable.
Let's not also forget Speilberg is taking a 1898 book and advancing the technology 107 years. If it was set in the time of the book, fine. But it wasn't. 107 years of more technology, and advancement in humanity. You can't just leave the ending unexplained and with that douchelike son still alive.
-Mark
Ahh, point taken. While I did enjoy ol’ Red’s voice, they could certainly have selected better passages from the book than the ones they included. I guess I wasn’t really looking for an explanation, since I’m so familiar with the original work.
As for new technology, I just have to express my love for a scene the 1953 movie by George Pal. They try firing a new a-bomb at one of the ships, and the army guys wear plastic ponchos and goggles. The rest of the town’s population is sitting on a hill that overlooks the valley, like they’re having a fucking picnic while watching the show. It’s bloody brilliant. Duck and cover, my friend.
And yeah, I was pleasantly surprised that they included references (albeit sometimes subtle) to the fact that the aliens were using humans like cattle. I never thought any of the culling or blood-sucking would make it into the script.
The whole tripods buried beneath the surface thing was a nice twist, though. And note that they were never referred to as Martians. Kinds of lends a little credibility.
See, that's where you and I differ. While you, an "intelligent, well-educated graduate" may be familiar with "books", 90% of the people watching this movie will not have read the book nor have any intention too. Hell, chances are most won't even know it's a book-turned-movie.
For the barely literate that do watch the movie, they will digest it and say "oo that had cool effects" or according to the MPAA, some stunt guy thinks we'll leave saying "you gotta check out this action sequence."
My point is that for the common folk that haven't read the book, they aren't familiar with the storyline. Personally I haven't read the book but I DO know what the movie was all about from synopsis...es of the book. And the point is, the ending was fucking terrible. The lack of explanation is forgiveable to a certain extent (even though the book DID explain it, thus wrapping things up nicely), but Spielberg, as usual, completely destroys what was otherwise a good movie with that heartfelt, "everything's alright" ending even though 1 billion people have died and apparently the Aliens would invade and destroy a small port town before owning Boston (cause that makes sense). There was too many holes in the ending for the movie to make rational sense.
-Mark
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